Well, here we are. It’s late January, the holidays are over, the weather is frigid, and the skies are gray. Knowing that I wouldn’t stick with them anyway, I never made any New Year’s resolutions this year. My vacation is behind me, and there’s a long stretch of weeks ahead on my calendar with no exciting events on the horizon. I work from home, we school from home, and there aren’t a whole lot of reasons for me to leave my home aside from groceries. I think that we all struggle with the post-holiday let down to some degree every year, but this year, having taken my tropical vacation right after New Year’s, rather than my usual late February, I am realizing that I have effectively prolonged the winter doldrums into a longer stretch than usual. In past years, the prospect of hopping on a plane in a few weeks usually gets me through; I spend my January planning my trip and shopping for bathing suits. This year, I am a little lost.
I am a restless soul; I always have been. I’ve always had the travel bug, and when I go too long stuck in one place my feelings of dissatisfaction can be huge. You could say I am a student of life, and I crave new experiences more than anything. Like the old adage, I’ll try anything twice! Historically, in February and March I tend to get a little “outside the box” in my search for entertainment. One year my husband and I did weekly wine tastings, another year we looked at buying property in Hawaii, and some years taken on home renovation projects, all in an effort to keep my interest piqued through the long, gray days of late winter.
It's not that I don’t have plenty to do right now; I am homeschooling, running my yoga business, which is up to five classes per week, keeping the books for my husband’s construction company, and running our household every day. It’s enough to fill the time, but it’s not enough to fill me. And although much of my daily routine is pleasant and enjoyable, I crave more. That restlessness in me has returned full force. Even my daily journal and tarot session has become bland; the readings all seem to say the same thing, the affirmations the same words over and over, just said in different ways, and even my meditations have become rote. I need to shake myself up. Here’s my plan of attack against the doldrums:
1 - Make plans
The first thing I did this morning when I got up was make reservations for four days camping at Watkins Glen State Park in western New York. I don’t have all the camping gear I need, I don’t know exactly how I will get there or who is coming with me, but those nineteen waterfalls sure as hell aren’t going to take pictures of themselves, and I’ve had this trip on my bucket list for way too long. I checked the average temps and settled on mid-May. That gives me plenty of time to prepare. The very next thing I did was buy tickets for the Worcester Museum of Art for next Friday. I literally just Googled “art museums in my area” and picked one I haven’t been to lately. It’s not the wildest experience out there, but I am inspired by art, I enjoy the atmosphere at museums, I always learn something, and it’s something to look forward to. I noticed that on the way home I’ll be driving right by one of my favorite greenhouses, so that will be a definite stop along the way, as well. I definitely could have just woken up one morning and decided to go to the museum without planning ahead, but if I’m being honest with myself, I am unlikely to do that. And it’s highly possible I’ll get restless enough to hop on a plane again in the next eight weeks, that's not even unlikely for me! Planning ahead by purchasing tickets and writing it in my calendar makes it happen for me. Whatever works for you, do it. Bottom line here is get yourself out of the house!
2 - Take a risk
Several of my yoga students (some of you lovely souls!) have asked me if I’d ever be willing to teach a class focused mainly on meditation or journaling. I’ve heard friends over and over again say “I really want to write in a journal, but I never know what to write!” or “your journal looks so pretty and mine is a mess!” Students and friends alike tell me they want to learn how to meditate, or they wish they could do it every day, but they don’t really know how. Enter….me. I can hear that Ursula (the evil witch from Little Mermaid) voice in my head right now, “oh my sweet dear, that is what I live for…” I’ve been toying with the idea for ages, and I finally decided to just take the plunge and offer a meditation and writing workshop. First, I spent hours writing up a plan, making a schedule, doing research, gathering resources, and visualizing how I wanted it to go. I was so inspired and excited about this workshop that I couldn’t rest until I had it all mapped out. It occupied my mind for days. I created a detailed plan, right down to the music and the handouts. I found out that I had so much information to share that it was hard to decide what to cut out to keep it within the three hour class! Then, I opened it for booking on my website yesterday.
It’s a risk. I could do all that work for nothing and nobody will sign up. I could have one person show and be embarrassed and disappointed. Can you imagine how awkward a workshop could be with only two participants? It’s my worst nightmare. BUT, it could also fill. I could be wildly successful (okay “wildly” might be a stretch, considering I capped attendance at eight people). It could be a beautiful experience, and maybe word will spread and the people will beg for more… here’s where I hear the Field of Dreams voice, “if you build it, they will come.” I’m taking a risk. It’s exciting and nerve-wracking and it gives me something to think about and plan for and look forward to. It’s a doldrum buster for sure.
3 - Switch up Daily Routines
As much as I like to learn and do new things, my main personality trait could probably be described as “the queen of routines.” It sounds boring, I know, but I am excellent with sticking to my plans. Maybe this is why I didn’t make any fresh New Year’s resolutions; I’m still sticking with the ones I made ten years ago. I wake up, meditate, journal, tarot, planner, breakfast, shower, home school, lunch, gym, dinner, yoga class, wash my face, and go to bed. Every. Single. Day. My routine is good for my mental and physical health, it helps me stick to my goals, and it helps me achieve them. But I am bored. I had to figure out how to make small changes to my routine to keep it fresh without derailing my progress or endangering my own success. This week:
I bought a new tarot deck. They are pretty and different and new. I’ll use my new cards for a while, just to spice things up. I tucked my old reliable set away for a bit (I can’t have them watching me while I enjoy these new cards, that’s just rude…).
I rearranged my workout routine. I have laminated exercise posters in my home gym, so I went at them with some colored expo markers and color-coded sets of exercises by muscle group to plan new sequences of sets when I lift weights. I almost forgot I had a landmine setup, it's been so long! That came off the shelf immediately.
I added a new section in my journal to record my dreams, and I designed a special symbol that they go with when I write them down. Now, before I go to bed every night I visualize that symbol in my head to remind my brain that I need to remember my dreams. In the morning, I draw that symbol on the paper to trigger the memory. It’s like doing a science experiment on myself! (Don’t ask me if it’s working, because then I’ll say that it is and things will get weird between us.)
Lastly, I bought new jeans. I know this sounds completely inconsequential, but hear me out. I normally wear either skinny jeans or bell bottoms, no in between. I bought a pair of those high-waisted wide leg ones that are all the rage with 20-somethings at the moment. I am wearing them RIGHT NOW, while I am writing this. They feel weird and I haven’t been able to figure out what kind of shirt or shoes goes with them, or if I should wear a belt or not, but they are different and cute in a “I feel slightly out of my element” sort of way. I might even leave the house in them today, take these new jeans for a stroll at the dollar store, who knows? Yes, they are just pants, but they are different and right now I need different.
People have busy lives. We have responsibilities, jobs, bills, kids, doctor’s appointments, and chores. Sometimes I think we forget to stop and notice that we have been running on auto-pilot. Our lives can appear to be one long series of reactions to things, rather than moments of planned and purposeful enjoyment. Routines are comforting and safe, especially when the world is full of risks and discomfort. However, when you take a moment to peer into your heart, do you find sadness there? Emptiness? Restlessness? Maybe you can’t hop on a plane to Thailand right now, or open a restaurant, or buy a sailboat (I mean, can any of us really do those things?) but you do have some modicum of control in your life. Make some plans, take a calculated risk, and switch up some of your daily routines. When the late winter doldrums come creeping in, keep them away by surprising yourself. Do something weird! Get uncomfortable! Learn something new! Change things up! And, as always, follow your heart.
**Update - After she finished writing this, she did go to the dollar store. She did not wear the jeans.
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"The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles..." ~Jack Kerouac
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