This morning I sat down with my gluten free bagel and iced tea to browse the headlines, and I found myself two bites in with tears in my eyes. As I scrolled through the news, I was utterly overcome with feelings of sadness and helplessness. I skimmed articles about climate change, accompanied by horrific photos of wildfires and floods all around the globe, animals caught in ocean plastic, reports of record heat and drought. Next was the Covid news; headlines about collapsing healthcare systems, overcrowded hospitals, children dying, anti-vax and anti-mask protests that ended in violence, and healthcare professionals with PTSD. I scrolled through images of desperate families in Afghanistan chasing American planes down the runway, begging for any means of escape as the US military leaves and the Taliban forces retake the country, women who face losing all of their human rights under the terrorist regime, and American soldiers with PTSD. Police murdering innocent people of color in the streets, oil pipelines bursting on sacred Native lands, the list goes on and on…
How does one deal with the constant bombardment? There must be some kind of balance between burying your head in the sand and living in complete ignorance in order to protect yourself, and becoming a news-obsessed political activist who is constantly devastated and enraged by every piece of information. This morning I was struck by the massive dichotomy between the chaos and devastation happening in the outside world and the beautiful peacefulness of my kitchen, with the sun streaming in the windows, my daughter safely dreaming in her bed, my refrigerator full of food, and the hummingbirds buzzing around the morning glories outside of my window as I calmly sip my tea. It’s hard to wrap your head around it. It’s also very easy to recognize that you have absolutely no control over most of what will happen in your life, and this can cause an immense amount of fear, apathy, anxiety, and depression.
Aside from being politically active, donating to charity, and trying your best to live eco-friendly, there are ways to help mitigate the feelings of helplessness that come with living though a decade of upheaval and change.
1. Love fiercely and freely. Tell people you love them. Tell your spouse and your children every single day. Tell your parents, siblings, anyone who you live with. Text your friends and tell them you love them each morning. As a teacher, at the end of each class block, I told my students I loved them before they left for their next class. Yell it to strangers in the street. Sign your emails with “Love,” and go through your social media putting hearts on every single post. You cannot run out of love; you have a limitless supply. In fact, the more love you give, the more you will have. Love is awesome like that. Give love away constantly and freely.
2. Radical self acceptance. Life goes by so very quickly; why do we waste it hating who we are, trying to stifle ourselves, conform to society, change our bodies and our words to suit everyone around us, and always striving to be “other?” You will never find peace this way! Recently I saw a video of a group of like-minded folks who dress up in medieval gear and go hiking together carrying primitive weaponry, and I thought “how beautiful!” I don’t personally want to participate in that activity, but the fact that these people had bravely chosen to live authentically, uniquely, and truly gave me such appreciation for the massive range and variety in the human race. This group of people had found each other only through expressing themselves exactly as they are. Imagine living as your truest self, and becoming a magnet for those who share your interests and values? So many people travel through life in isolation… what if radical self love and acceptance would end that loneliness?
3. Be brave enough to be kind. I have been thinking about this one a lot lately, because I have witnessed unkindness in my personal life recently. And this is what I know about people who are unkind; they are also unkind to themselves. Being rude, uncaring, offensive, or insulting to others is almost always a way for people to deal with their own insecurities and feelings of inadequacy. Making fun of someone else is almost always a reaction to feelings of personal embarrassment or fear of not fitting in. Being a kind person is an incredibly courageous thing to do, because it requires you to open yourself up to others. Practicing kindness can make you appear vulnerable. But what most people don’t know is that kind people are true warriors of the heart; they are confident and strong and sure of themselves. Be brave enough to care about others, to show support, to encourage those around you, to lift others up; there is plenty of room in the sky for all of the birds to fly. Kind people live with the confidence that their hearts are strong enough to handle exposure.
Loving myself and others, and practicing bravery in kindness doesn’t make me feel less sad for the world and the state of humanity. Sadness is an emotion that I need to accept and welcome as a guest, with the knowledge that all things end. Horrible things will always happen in the world, and I acknowledge that I have little to no control over most of it. But I do have control over myself. I commit every day to the idea that creating peace within myself is creating world peace. So, if nothing else, find time to create peace inside of yourself each day. Meditate, dance, breathe, walk in nature, put your bare feet on the grass, sing, or just watch a hummingbird outside of your kitchen window. One hour or one minute, whatever you have to spare. This world needs all of the peace it can get, and you have the ability to create it one minute at a time.
May all beings be joyful and free.
May all beings be healthy and strong.
May all beings be safe and at peace.
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